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Episode 20: Mad.In.Love Podcast
Today Dr. Hawkins is joined by his colleague Dr. John Hudson who helped co-create the NEAI (Narcissism and Emotional Abuse Inventory), an important tool they use in their practice at the Marriage Recovery Center to determine whether a person has narcissistic traits, and how extensive and pervasive those traits are. They created the NEAI because they found there are few to no assessment tools available that can quantify the level of narcissistic and emotionally abusive traits a person has. For our clinicians here at the Marriage Recovery Center, it is useful for highlighting the problematic thinking and behavior patterns that are at the root cause of so many relationship issues. If you are interested in finding out if you, or someone you know, has narcissistic traits, you can take the NEAI quiz here: https://www.flexiquiz.com/SC/N/Neai4website
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Dr. Hawkins and his team of experts offer education and professional training as well as treatment for narcissistic and emotional abuse.
π WEBSITE: https://marriagerecoverycenter.com/
βοΈ PHONE: (206) 219-0145
π§ EMAIL: info@marriagerecoverycenter.com
About
The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts about narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.
Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships. He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse.
Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship. In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, topics include covert, reactive, spiritual, secondary, relationship trauma and more.
#narcissist #narcissism #npd
My husband went out of his way to be difficult during times when I needed to discuss things with him . When we needed to resolve conflict. He gave silent treatment, mocked, yelled, was hateful, withholding, would not look at me, would continually seek reasons to leave the room and take forever to return to the supposed to be conversation, demean, try to bait and switch, blame shift, gaslight, ignore, uncompromising, unemotional, cold, belligerent, lack of ownerships and responsibility for their roles, etc and then punish you for all , in many ways in the days ahead. Total hellβ¦β¦
Thanks SO MUCH FOR YOUR KNOWLEDGE AND TIME π!!! SO VERY IMPORTANT. INSIGHT IS SO ESSENTIAL. MUMS rearing their girl children USE A GREAT DEAL OF UNCONSTRUCTIVE ABUSIVE Name calling & critical harsh harmful unreasonable unrealistic demands π’π’π’ on 7 yr
Olds. Believe everything mum says. Crushing her daughters heart π’π’π’. No praise π’.
Can someone do an exit/escape video for trapped housewives?
He doesn't want to solve it, he only wants to be right and in control.
Good morning, watching from Tulsa Oklahoma.
I love that you detail the specifics concerning some of the questions. I hope there will be a part 2 and 3 where you detail the other questions as well.
Compromise? Never!π―
Defer to others? Never!π―
Force agreement? Yes, every time!π―
What I should be, do, say? Yes, no allowance for individuality!π―
Collaboration on solutions? No, never!π―
Gives agreement without retaliation? Never!π―
EVERYTHING IS SO SO DIFFICULT WITH HIM!π―
Emotional immaturity? ABSOLUTELY YES!π―
Receives feedback? Never!π―
Blame-shifting for all negative outcomes? Yes!π―
βChange? Why do I need to change, are you perfect?β ALL THE TIME!π―
Dear Lord, I must remove myself.ππ»ππ»ππ»ππ»ππ»
NPD is not going to get better. They only get better at hiding it from the outside world.
Please donβt encourage victims/targets to stay. Traits are one thing. True NPD and psychopathy are another altogether.
Mine will ask me and then does the opposite every time. When we were in mandatory counciling the therapist everytime he asked me a question he answered for me even when the therapist said I asked your wife let her answer. As soon as I would start to speak he would cut me off and answer again for me. When he was asked to let me respond he stood up and walked out, never to go back again. Even though it was court appointed. Were there repercussions for not going. No
This was 100% my husband. Yes, I have no doubt. I am married to a narcissist. Thank you so much. I would really like to see the rest of the questions to see what I am up against, but I already have an idea.
Does this marriage institute ever see recovery from a narcissist??
My mom is a narcissist, and quite possibly a sociopath, she makes everyone around her miserable
I suspect those who take the narcissist quiz are those who don't want to be one. LOL
Iβm so glad you included the retaliation question. Abusers are concerned with image management. Sometimes a covert narcissist will agree to something to appear cooperative, but the punishment that comes later is worse than getting what we wanted (or needed) to begin with. Itβs another form of coercive control.
I do not think a test would work…..They never take responsibility anyway…They think that they are ok..π²
I am very skeptical. I imagine that if my husband of 35 abusive years would answer this questionnaire about me, I would be the one who is reported as refusing to change. He is the one that uses the word "compromise" all the time. As an example, he offers to have a conversation with me on the conditions that he doesn't feel worse after a conversation and that we solve at least one issue however minor. This comes from a person who did not share a video service subscription password with me because he doesn't trust me, told me I don't have the personality to be an independent contractor, told me I can't handle more children (many years ago), recently told me that I never fail to disappoint. Of course as I get stronger I am less likely to compromise or want to change my behavior. I spent most of my life trying to be enough and always knowing that a new inadequacy would be pointed out. How does your questionnaire differentiate between the description of a narcissistic spouse and the description of a victim who has had it?
Thank you for sharing this
Reactive Abuse is a reaction to the Abuse!