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Have you ever tried to have a conversation with someone that leaves you feeling like you are stumbling around in a maze of confusion that you don’t know how to get out of? This is often the case when you are talking with a person with narcissistic tendencies. Everywhere you turn you’re met with deflection, denial, blame-shifting, deception and accusations, leaving you so confused you no longer know which way is up or down. In this video, Dr. Hawkins talks about what to do if you find yourself in this maze of confusion, and how to find your way out.
You can read more about The Maze of Confusion on The Mend Project’s website: https://themendproject.com/when-abuse-creates-a-maze-of-confusion/
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Dr. Hawkins and his team of experts offer education and professional training as well as treatment for narcissistic and emotional abuse.
🌐 WEBSITE: https://marriagerecoverycenter.com/
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About
The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts about narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.
Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships. He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse.
Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship. In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, topics include covert, reactive, spiritual, secondary, relationship trauma and more.
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Thank you so much…
Yep. And DARVO. But showing these things to the abusive individual DOES NOTHING good. It may give him hints on how to behave like a normal human being which he may start doing here and there in the middle of the maze of confusion which will only leave you feeling more confused.
Those conversations happen once in awhile with people who aren’t narcissists, but not consistently
The issue for me is i don't know how to get out of it…
Im almost 70 , have always been a housewife …
I have NO MONEY of my own , NO WHERE to go …
I just can't deal with the Negativity any more…
I stay in my bedroom most of the time … Im ready to Check Out … My options are very limited…
I can't take it anymore ……………
Yes, we can call them thinking mistakes, but I believe what we are really dealing with are people that have a low IQ–"high functioning morons" (sorry, I know it sounds pretty harsh and don't recommend we use the phrase). They are tricking us into thinking it's an emotional thing but it's really a physiological brain defect. They simply cannot figure out how to get from point A to point B. That takes intelligence. Intelligent people can block out all the "cognitive dissonance," competing ideas and excuses to find a straight path to a direct, helpful, sensible reply. We think it's easy because we fall within the normal IQ range. But to narcissists, mentally impaired individuals, they can't see their way clear to doing things correctly, simply because they are not smart enough. And because the issue is a physiological brain defect, nothing can be done about their condition since medical science just doesn’t know enough about the brain.
I love Annette and all the good she is doing with The Mend Project!! ❤
Thank you 🙏🏼
My gf would told me there is no boundaries in relationship, i have right to know all, and u must be honest with me. (I must have controll all the time, if not im gonna make your life misserable and hell)! And she did, i lost myself in constant argues trying to point wrong things and let her know that she often hurt my feeling chasing her peace. That result a 6 years of me trying to sattle things, i have toughts from start that this is all wrong and i was thinking about breaking up wich never happened coz i feelt torn a part seeing her sad and unhappy… those moments of her breakdowns are worst trauma to me… At some point there is no break from fights, later i start to fight back, wich made me feel bether, you know eye for an eye but at the end nothing good, just more misserable moments… I just wanna to catch a break and decide what to do with our relationship, but never get that break and time to settle. And after one argue where traditionaly imaginary outcome that was on her mind out of some stupid situation didnt lost me in a fight, i strated to cry and sobe and was shocked , i coudnt put myself together after 4 month… I become different quiet person, no joy, no life, no plans, my own toughts beggan to presure me coz i dont know how i end up so fucked up… We are still together, but in my hearth i see her as a danger and my body react to that, and i also feel so sorry for fact that im aware this must end and only way is to say goodbye… Before when i belived when we separate i would be able to solve my problem, and have peace, i knowed it would be hard and difficult but i knowed i can overcome this, but since that breakdown i had, it totally change me, i feel depresed, empty, i can cry when i think about us, it drain life out of me. Before i was able ti think about other womans and life i
I deserve and that would calm me, and now i have no emotion towards that, wich rly scare me coz its not real for person like i am…. I rly enjoyed my work, but it effect even that, even work remind me of trauma coz fe fight a lot because of my job and returning home happy and comunicate with my cooworkers, would give her reason to attack on me…And i must work and act like im ok… I would like comment from you doctor….
Truths. Now how does one like myself make change? Be aware, stay aware? I think so. Hold accountably and be honest with myself? I think so. True honesty, because narcissists can gaslight their own brain, and to think what the real honesty is, may or may not be the real. So fellow narcs, ask your self, are you using manipulated tactics to shut her up cuz it’s easier that way to make and feel better about yourself? Or are you feeling the pain and really accepting yourself of what you are and want to make change? It’s Not a normal, we have the choice.
Thank you again. Very good and very true. I've been trying to show my husband what he does for years . He does refuse. He has changed his tactics in these latter years. He might even say 'I can see what you're saying' or 'I don't disagree with you' when I explain a pattern. It sounds all good until I realize its just a newer smarter way of shutting me up. He says it and then just like the man who forgets his own reflection in Scripture, literally as he turns around, it's filed away in his mental box for background noise (that's how meaningful I am), and he carries on as he always did and it's forgotten. He is unmoved, unchanged and uncaring. It's like being trapped in a sick hamster wheel that turns around and around going nowhere.
Thats y they don't change, they know how to play their games and they benefit from it.
No accountability and manipulation, blame and shame game..
*Much Respect